Life

It’s about to go down: literally

For those of you who have been following me for a while, you’ll remember that I have Ulcerative Colitis. I’ve had it for about 16 years. There have been many ups and downs, medication switches, trips to the hospital, and, yes, colonoscopies.

Because of my illness, I have them every two years. I know. I’m lucky like that. And instead of having 4 biopsies done, I get about 40 which makes my recovery time all that much more enjoyable. But, due to the pandemic, the last one I had was in 2018. They pushed them back, and rightfully so.

It is now my turn to get the once over. A recent test indicated my illness might be active again (though I feel okay.) The meds I’m currently on are only usually good for about 10 years before their effectiveness wanes. It’s been twelve. There are other medications, but they are a higher class of drugs and come with more side effects, blood tests, etc., so we’ve been trying to stay on my current meds for as long as we can. This colonoscopy will determine if that course of treatment is over. If it is, a whole new treatment (and potential rough few months as we try doses out.)

For those of you who have had colonoscopies, you know that the prep is the worst. But up until this one, it was a prep I knew well. Miralax mixed with Gatorade and a 4 dose of Dulcolax. And then, get comfortable in the bathroom. I had a system. This year, however, I have a new GI doc, with a new prep.

If it’s lemon, why does it have a green label? I got excited that it was lime. The jerks.

Drinking this much fluid isn’t daunting to me. I drink a LOT of water usually. It’s the speed at which you have to drink it that is challenging. If it were just water, no problem. I drink water fast normally, but this is gonna have a flavor. Probably a strong one to cover the taste of the med. I mean, lemon’s okay, but THAT much lemon? With the old prep, I could change up the flavors so it wasn’t so gagging at the taste. This time, it’s all lemon, all of the time. I should be grateful it wasn’t pineapple like my mother’s was. *shivers. (Update: I did half the prep last night. There was NO lemon taste. It tastes like watered-down salt water. Nasty.)

My son will drive me to the procedure where I hope things go as smoothly as one can expect. Mercifully, I have the day off and work from home, so my week-long recovery from so many biopsies should be as comfortable as it can possibly be. (Yes, I have a donut pillow and a sitz bath. This may be part of the reason I’m still single…)

Afterward, it’s a waiting game to hear from the doc about what the future holds. She’s guessing it is gonna be a monthly iv medication. Oh, joy. Stay tuned.


Danielle/Dani Bannister author and drinker of all the gross stuff

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